Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Renard Breen must not be allowed to reproduce.


I am Korluus, the Emerging, the Keeper of Relois.

I was conducting further experiments in the improvement of the cardio-pulmonary system through synthetic augmentation of the lungs and heart by injected fiber reinforcement. I was endeavoring to discover whether or not there was a significant difference in the survival rates of subjects undergoing the treatment (involving the direct injection of a heated liquid fiber compound into the lining of the lungs and heart) who have been allowed limited pain relief and those who are allowed no pain relief at all.

While so engaged, I received an urgent notice on my monitor. When I answered, I heard nothing more than labored breathing and therefore disconnected the line. The monitor almost immediately notified me of another call. An unfamiliar voice asked me if something called a "refrigerator" was running. I presumed that this referred to my cooling unit and therefore I replied that it seemed to be operating within acceptable limits. This person replied that if that was so then I should "catch it," and then disconnected the line. Before I had even pierced the next subject's sternum with the needle, my monitor called again. This time the same voice asked if I "had Prince Albert in a can." Upon accessing my records, I found that in point of fact an "Albert" had been killed by the plague in the first wave of deaths, but that his remains had been dissected and disposed of several solar shifts later. I discussed this fact with the caller and described the dismemberment process slowly and in great detail to him; he seemed to be at a loss for words and did not interrupt me again.

Apparently, my caller was this "Renard Breen" creature. I have sent my Arc Priests on a full sweep of the surrounding territory with orders to detain and sterilize him before he can do any damage to the genetic pool.

Also, I found that the endorphins produced by the pain response aid in proper bonding. I have therefore ceased to use anesthetic in this procedure. I do find the screaming to be distracting.

I am Korluus, the Emerging, the Keeper of Relois.

2 comments:

  1. That's the guy! That's the one I been looking for. Don't just sterilize that &#^#% Breen, kill the blasted rat! And send me the body; I wanna get him fitted for his cement bathing trunks. The East River is waiting.

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  2. Shucks, where's your sense of humor, Mal? Didn't you like the nice hotfoot I gave you yesterday morning?

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